Veronika Mossum

My lovely grandmother<3

I spoke to My grandma at the phone recently, she is having some trouble with her memory and think that is very hard to cope with, so she was in a really bad mood when i called her. She asked me almost angry why i was calling.
But after a while, when i had told her about My new job and other news. She became happier. I told her that a friend i had when i was little once Said to me, that she wanted memoryloss when she became old. I asked why?? And she Said; because then i can give christmas gifts to myself! And My grandma laughed.
It feels so good to make her laugh. At the end of our conversation her bad mood was gone and she was her old happy, loving self again.
That made me so happy, and i really want to call her more often.

Sometimes I just want to shrink down to the size of a small doll, just to be able to cuddle with my rats for real. I mean, it look sooo cozy when they cuddle up to eachother and sleep all day. <3

Gain of weight.

I worry that people can see my gain of weight.

I worry that people talk about my gain of weight.

I worry about what they say.

But the thing is..

Maybe they don’t think about me, the way I think about me.

Maybe they don’t care.

Maybe they think it’s okay.

Maybe they even say I look beautiful.

And what if…

They even think that I am…


Would it matter?

One hears it a lot on airplanes: “Make sure you have your own mask on, before helping others with theirs.”

—Daniel Handler (Lemony Snicket), upon being asked "What’s your very best life advice?"  (via n-xi)

(Source: man-eatingcat, via freeingeileen)

I know better now, and so I am trying to do better. It is painful because the old ways are so comfortable but I know in my heart that pain is the only thing that will bloom if I go backwards and plant the same seeds I always did.

I want to feel the sun kiss my skin, and watch the light grow inside of me. So yes, I know better, and yes I will try to do better. I will trust that this uncomfortable feeling will fade into peace, and I will be one step closer to being free in me.

I am letting go of many things, thoughts, feelings, and people that have weighed me down until the water filled my lungs. I am learning how to breathe again without them, and it feels bittersweet but I know this is what is right for me.

I won’t explain or justify myself to anyone. I will live out my life with joy, with peace, with honesty, and I will not let anything unravel me again.

This is my story, and beautiful things will be written in each page. The light will soak into my words, and I will come alive in each chapter. No more holding back. No more pleasing you. No more making myself small to make you more. I am here, and I am going to take up space. I am going to live.

Dele Olanubi (via bealightinthedark)

I love this.

(via attackanxiety)

(via freeingeileen)